Choosing an Adoption Agency is a very important decision. Adopting is an emotional process with lots of bumps and unexpected turns. Make sure you feel comfortable with the social workers you'll be working with through this momentous journey. Meet with a few different adoption agencies (if possible) and ask lots of questions. Keep in mind that this is after all, a business for them, so listen to your "Spidey sense."
I called our local adoption association and asked if they could give me the names and numbers of people who had recently adopted, so I could talk with them about their experience with the agencies they used. The adoption association was helpful and gave me a list of people, who had volunteered to be contacts for other prospective adoptive parents, like myself. I was able to contact three people from the list and speaking with them was interesting, even though none of them had used the agencies we were thinking about.
I called our local adoption association and asked if they could give me the names and numbers of people who had recently adopted, so I could talk with them about their experience with the agencies they used. The adoption association was helpful and gave me a list of people, who had volunteered to be contacts for other prospective adoptive parents, like myself. I was able to contact three people from the list and speaking with them was interesting, even though none of them had used the agencies we were thinking about.
My husband and I met with 2 different agencies and immediately were uncomfortable with the "sales pitch" given by the director of the first agency. We heard afterward that some people loved that agency, and others had bad experiences with them. We decided not to sign on with them.
We did feel comfortable with the second agency. We compared the fees between both the agencies and the fees were comparable. Definitely ask for a fee schedule before you proceed though, each agency does things differently, including at what point in the process they require payment. One agency will request payment in lump sums of $2000, and another agency will request $4000 lump sum payments.
One of the reasons we went with the second agency is they provided a weekend information workshop without having to sign on with them. This workshop was very informative. Just being able to connect with other couples who are going through the same thing you are and knowing you're not alone, was comforting. The social workers facitilitating covered theory and psychology in adoption. There was also a panel of birth mothers, that told their story and we were able to ask them questions. This was very eye opening and certainly helped put aside fears of openess in adoption. The next day there was a panel of adoptive parents who shared their stories which was equally informative.
We did feel comfortable with the second agency. We compared the fees between both the agencies and the fees were comparable. Definitely ask for a fee schedule before you proceed though, each agency does things differently, including at what point in the process they require payment. One agency will request payment in lump sums of $2000, and another agency will request $4000 lump sum payments.
One of the reasons we went with the second agency is they provided a weekend information workshop without having to sign on with them. This workshop was very informative. Just being able to connect with other couples who are going through the same thing you are and knowing you're not alone, was comforting. The social workers facitilitating covered theory and psychology in adoption. There was also a panel of birth mothers, that told their story and we were able to ask them questions. This was very eye opening and certainly helped put aside fears of openess in adoption. The next day there was a panel of adoptive parents who shared their stories which was equally informative.
We also found out at the workshop that you can request a social worker to write your homestudy. So we requested one of the social workers who facilitated the workshop and we were very glad we did that. She turned out to be a wonderful support and resource.
We live in Canada, and in our province, the social workers who work closely with adoptive families are contract workers. They often have contracts with multiple adoption agencies. So if you like a particular social worker, find out which agencies they have contracts with and you can choose an agency on that basis as well.
If you initially meet with a social worker that was assigned to you by the agency and you don't feel comfortable with him or her, call the agency right away to request a different social worker. You will be spending hours talking with the social worker about your life and your philosophies about parenting, and other very personal information, so make sure you like them.
Yes, the information the social worker is gathering about you is very detailled and personal. If you're a private person, and the thought of telling a virtual stranger intimate details about yourself and your partner feels uncomfortable- then join the club! I'm right there with you! But stop and think about it from the birthmother's point-of-view. If you were a birthmother, wouldn't you want to know some detailled information about the couple who could parent your biological child?
We adopted locally for both of our girls. I cannot emphasize enough how important choosing an adoption agency is. The adoption agency you choose will be your guide through unknown territory, so make sure you trust them. Get a feel for whether the agency is pro-birthmother or pro-adoptive family or is there a balance? Hopefully there's a balance and the agency truly wants to make sure it's the right match by helping the birthmother find the right family for her biological child.
Does the agency provide adequate counselling to the birthmothers? This was very important to me. I wanted to make sure the birthmothers were receiving excellent counselling and support so it was less likely they would change their minds down the road. The social workers we spoke with said they helped the birthmother go through a list of possible options to explore the ways in which she could parent. The last option on the list was an adoption plan. I was very happy to hear that, because again, there would be less chance the birthmother would change her mind later on.
Do the agency staff seem organized? There is alot of paperwork and legal work to be done at various stages of the adoption process. Ensure you have faith that the agency will not lose important documents, etc. so your adoption will take place as smoothly as possible.
Remember, even the smoothest adoptions have bumps and every adoption is different. My kids are worth every bump along the way.
We live in Canada, and in our province, the social workers who work closely with adoptive families are contract workers. They often have contracts with multiple adoption agencies. So if you like a particular social worker, find out which agencies they have contracts with and you can choose an agency on that basis as well.
If you initially meet with a social worker that was assigned to you by the agency and you don't feel comfortable with him or her, call the agency right away to request a different social worker. You will be spending hours talking with the social worker about your life and your philosophies about parenting, and other very personal information, so make sure you like them.
Yes, the information the social worker is gathering about you is very detailled and personal. If you're a private person, and the thought of telling a virtual stranger intimate details about yourself and your partner feels uncomfortable- then join the club! I'm right there with you! But stop and think about it from the birthmother's point-of-view. If you were a birthmother, wouldn't you want to know some detailled information about the couple who could parent your biological child?
We adopted locally for both of our girls. I cannot emphasize enough how important choosing an adoption agency is. The adoption agency you choose will be your guide through unknown territory, so make sure you trust them. Get a feel for whether the agency is pro-birthmother or pro-adoptive family or is there a balance? Hopefully there's a balance and the agency truly wants to make sure it's the right match by helping the birthmother find the right family for her biological child.
Does the agency provide adequate counselling to the birthmothers? This was very important to me. I wanted to make sure the birthmothers were receiving excellent counselling and support so it was less likely they would change their minds down the road. The social workers we spoke with said they helped the birthmother go through a list of possible options to explore the ways in which she could parent. The last option on the list was an adoption plan. I was very happy to hear that, because again, there would be less chance the birthmother would change her mind later on.
Do the agency staff seem organized? There is alot of paperwork and legal work to be done at various stages of the adoption process. Ensure you have faith that the agency will not lose important documents, etc. so your adoption will take place as smoothly as possible.
Remember, even the smoothest adoptions have bumps and every adoption is different. My kids are worth every bump along the way.
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