These are the Trials of Life

I've been reading stories about adoption experiences, particularly adoptees who are angry and bitter. I don't understand their pain. Nor do they understand mine. These are the trials of life. Feeling as though one is displaced without roots, feeling rejected, asking why me. It's not fair. Why? I used to wonder why was I not allowed to experience the joys of pregnancy. Sometimes I still wonder, will my daughter have a better relationship with her birthmother than she does with me? Why can't it be easy. Why can't it be simple. Why can't it be better than it is.

Because these are the trials of life. These are the bumps in the road that we all live with in these days of ours. Why stop asking why, with adoption? Why do some people get cancer or Aids or suddenly die of a heart attack? Why are some involved in a tragic accident leaving them paralyzed? Why are children abducted and sold into slavery? Why did the tsunami kill so many people and leave others half-dead, homeless and hungry? Millions of people.

Why?

Is anyone immune? No. Some coast through pretty well, for awhile if they're lucky, but the bumps come and sometimes they're so big, you'll feel displaced for awhile.

What we're left with is, how do we choose to react to the trials of life. Anger can lead to action, which can be helpful. Peace, another choice. What is our experience of life through these trials? Does worrying help? Does resentment help? How do you choose to live your life? Does it mean anything? What gives your life meaning, and does it also give you joy?

Whatever your calling, whatever your trial, my hope is that you find a space created by you and just for you, that you can call your own and you can claim your peace and joy or whatever other emotion helps you feel settled, and resolute, amidst the trials of life.

Celebrity Adoptions

If I were an alien peering from outer space and used magazine covers to figure 'us' out, I'd conclude that adopting is popular among our species. There have been alot of headlines capturing adoptions by celebrities. Transracial celebrity adoptions in particular have received alot of attention the past few years. From Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt adopting children from Cambodia (Maddox), Africa (Zahara), and Vietnam (Pax), to Madonna adopting a child from Africa (David Banda), and the latest news, Sandra Bullock adopting Louis (isn't he darling?) from New Orleans.

My hope is that all of this attention will underline a recurring theme, which is families don't always look alike, but they are families, so get used to it. Regardless of race or colour, a family is a collection of souls abiding together. To spend any time or give any attention to race, or colour is focussing on the superficial. Unfortunately many people in our culture are superficial, that is a reality. It's not just superficiality, but also a matter of exposure. How many transracial families live in your neighborhood? How often do you see a transracial family when your out and about? These days we're seeing more and more and I think the more the better.

Whether it's a picture on a magazine cover or a family in your neighborhood, it's good to be reminded that families come together in different ways, BUT, more importantly, they're a family. Families are the fundamental building block of our society. The stronger our families, the stronger our nation. Children are our future regardless of race, culture, or celebrity status. Let's help them get a good start.