Infertility and Adoption

I always knew I wanted to be a mom. If I couldn't be a mom I'd feel incomplete, that's how strong the urge was for me. My husband and I went through the in vitro process twice- both attempts were obviously, not successful. I'm glad we went through the in vitro process because I always would have wondered if it would have worked, if we had'nt tried.

It's not fair that some people can make babies so easily and others can't with no rhyme or reason. My husband and I got married young and continue to have a strong, loving relationship. We'd been married for ten years before we started trying to have a family, so we knew we had a strong foundation. I never, ever would have guessed that we would have infertility problems. It's such a shock, I felt like I was in a bad dream that I couldn't wake up from. It just wasn't fair that we did everything right and yet we couldn't move forward to start a family, something that was so easy for other people.

I still have difficulties seeing single moms in the grocery store or at the mall, who treat their kids with such disrespect and don't appreciate the gifts they've been given. Kids never get to choose their parents, but the idealist in me wishes every child could have two great parents, because that's what every child deserves, just for being born.

Infertility isn't fair, but if you want to have any sort of peace and be able to move on, you have to accept infertility for what it is. There is no why me. It is what it is. If you struggle against what you cannot change, you waste energy that could be better used elsewhere. I've made peace with our infertility, I cannot change it, I must accept it. Adoption is a wonderful option, but it's also more emotionally complicated than I expected. I'd do all over again just to be a mom, for me, it was worth it.